Silhouette Dreams

messed up.

2010-06-12T23:34:00.002+08:00

i'm sure.. that in life, everyone has regrets. everyone makes mistakes. we're only human. people say, they don't regret making those mistakes.. cos otherwise, they wouldn't learn anything. life, experience and all that shit. i know it's suppose to be a wise saying and I've always tried being positive and all, but for some reason i think that it's all just bullshit. sometimes.. i just get so upset with what i do and say.. people say, be yourself. you have to accept one another for who they are.. for who YOU are. but then again.. people criticize about one another. humans, man. we're the most hypocritical species in the world, no? people suck. :]

if only.. you could understand how it feels from my end. if only you knew what i'm going through. if only you could understand how much i have to put up with. if only you knew how my smile covers the tracks of my tears. if only you knew how hard it is not to be as "gifted" as some people. if only you knew.. how i regret making this huge mistake in my life. we've all got our problems, i know. and i'm sure you have yours too. and you'll probably say that your problems are worst compared to mine. but the difference between you and me is that i don't give you that much of a hard time and i don't deliberately hurt your feelings. if you only you know how hard it is for me to mend my already broken heart. so what if i'm "emotionally unstable", that's just me. you just don't know what I've to do survive in this world. you're not pushing me to do better, you're pushing in a way that i feel worse about myself. sometimes, i feel so insecure that i just feel like i want to give up. YES, I'M NOT AS GIFTED AS YOU ARE. I'M SORRY. i just don't see that in myself. it's probably just not my passion. whenever i talk about MY passion, things I LIKE, it's a crime.. so what am i to do? so sekadar, man. it's just so unfair that when others say something, it's nothing compared to when i say something. biased. biased biased biased! i just wanna give up.. yes, i'm a quitter. but is it really quitting when you realize that what you're doing isn't really what you're passionate about? do you really want to live your life a lie? live your life doing something you don't love? is it a crime searching for your true calling? working hard for a bigger picture? doing something that actually goes somewhere? focusing on your real priorities in life? i think not. i just wish everyone could see that. i just wish everyone could pop the bubble that we're living in and start to realize that we've got other important things in life.

you think it's easy, don't you? well news flash, mister. it's not as simple as you think it could be. it's probably easy for you to say. you don't have dark clouds hovering above your head pressuring you. telling you to do this and that, expecting you to achieve this and that, wanting you to be like this and that. these clouds.. they just wouldn't go away. sometimes, i think.. what if i don't want to be this and that? what if i just wanna be me? but no~ these stupid clouds just keep pushing me. telling me i can't be myself, i can't do what i want. easy for you all to say. you would think that a girl my age could have at least the right to do what i want. *sigh. how do i run away from this? well... okay, i can't run from it. i just don't know how to solve it. i don't know how to say what i need to say and stand up for myself without having to face others being disappointed in me. why in God's name do i have to please these people? why can't i just please myself the way i want? i just wanna live MY LIFE, dammit. just go away. my life is DAMNED. DAMNED, i tell you. DAMNED! the past just keeps coming back. the same issues just keep crashing my door step. they just don't go away. why won't they just leave me alone. LEAVE ME ALONE! this just sucks. big time.

whatever.

nhnasfkjajhdsfhjnwfccxm qoajhdqojdpidapiapjodhcinwifhqojoj027064408-uquw08ehdqijansbcjvsdclkk[dii2299yyr9un!!!!!!!!!!!! :]

Happy 61st Birthday, Atok. :]

2009-12-13T21:54:00.002+08:00

we all went out for brunch at Emperor's Court, Manggis Mall today. all you can eat buffet, man! awesome shit. biasa le, i ate A LOT. HAHAHA! dim sum wah tu! D: i never get tired of dim sum. hehe. it was great. so happy that i got to see the smile on atok's face. :] haven't bought pressie for atok yet. *sigh. but mom said that we're gonna buy something for atok nanti, so yay. :D

at izah's now. played congkak, uno and speed with them kids.... and uncu. HEHE. oish i feel so sleepy. woke up early tadi coz we had to go for brunch, so yeah. tired coz i rarely wake up early since winter break started. HEHE. shit, now i remember that i have a lot of homework and studying to do. haish. anyway, gonna watch Fresh Prince now with them girls.

loves! S2

today's jam session

2009-12-11T22:46:00.006+08:00

as usual, i sucked. hahahah. Yazin said this before we left the studio,

"you should bring your keyboard."

and Kaza went, "yeah, you should."

and so i did. esok tah ku practise! :P

asal Kaza or Nazz masuk kereta as we picked them up,

Yazin would go, "Kaza/Nazz! marahi si Amal!" - pasal I couldn't make it to our first EPIC performance during the Kendo Alliance dinner.

haissh. they haunt me. Nazz was understanding though. she went, "but she couldn't come." aw yay, i love you NAZZ! (^_^)y hahah! although i did get to watch the video of their performance that night. they all lectured Nazz coz she was being random that night. it was so cool coz they all wore hats as a gimmick. eeeehh awesome lah. i wish i was there that night. they all have stalkers sudah. HAHAH! Dayat threw his "farm" hat in the mid of the song, kali. cali laa. the girls' hats were sooo cool! eh kusut ku. hahaha siuk wah! D:

ah anyway today was awesome la. learnt new chords/keys to kaza's song What I Want To Say, Makes Me Wonder and the solo part of It's Not Easy (which was suppose to be a guitar solo). hahaha i don't know why but i kept going "eeeeeeppp!" dari tadi. pasal i was so hyped up over the number of songs we've got sudah. awesome shit, maan.

EH KAZA! I'M YOUR NUMBER ONE FAN! AKU HAFAL LAGU MU! D:

hahaha. yetah Yazin said aku inda boleh ada mic, pasal i get over excited sometimes. hahaha. i can babble all day about today's session. would've been more fun if Nadzif and Nunu were there tadi. coz they played cover songs of From The Inside by Linkin Park and Haruka Kanata by Asian Kung-Fu Generation. i just sang along la and i screamed tadi. we all did. it was so FUN! but my sore hurt afterwords. lol.

oh oh! and we had McD today!

peace out! :P

ETHAN.

2009-12-10T01:57:00.010+08:00

ETHAN a.k.a IHSAN wants to check out my blog coz i told him i mentioned his name earlier on, so i take this opportunity to REALLY talk about him before i tell him my link.

he is...

~~mean, an ass, a jerk, a perv (HAHAH!) and a bitch~~

cute, a sweetie pie, an awesome shit friend and.. still a bitch. but he's my bitch. HAHAHAH!

i love you, san. ;p S2

REGRETS.

2009-12-10T01:38:00.003+08:00

i regret not doing my research before i took my A level subjects. why couldn't i have been more sure about my university course and future? God. i don't know why but apparently i felt like doing my research tonight. because i'm planning to take mathematics course for university, i wanted to find out which is the best uni and what are the requirements. and most universities want A Level Mathematics AND Further Mathematics. i'm only taking A Level Maths. oh how i regret my choices. now i'm prolly gonna have to change to further maths next term and struggle to catch up with them. i hope i can still switch to further maths. the sad thing is, my psychology timetable will change. i love psychology and my psychology teacher is awesome! i've really grown attached to her. without her, i would have never loved psychology. but since psychology is not my major, maths is more important. *sigh. this is so sad and frustrating. of all times to be frustrated. it's winter break, dammit! -___-" i just don't want anymore failures. i have to really work hard next term. although if i don't have further maths, i can always take STEP papers and study further maths in advance on my own so that i don't struggle during my maths course in uni. hmm, that might just work. gaaaah.

"i'm stuck in this indecision"

can't wait to jam with the kidneys and just throw away these negativities! i have to console ethan now, he's sulking about some issues. kesian him hehe. alright, goodnight world. S2

updates.

2009-12-09T17:45:00.006+08:00

it really has been a while hasn't it?

okay, updates so far. way back in.. June? July? i got an offer to go to JIS. took a lot of briefings, meetings, submitting forms and interviews. late August, got the call and quit PTEM. moved to JIS, been living in a boarding house, started school on 1st September (i think) and went on from that. more than three months had passed and now it's winter break. another term has vanished in the haze. funny thing is, i've always dread the days during the first couple of months at JIS. begging to God time would pass by quickly. things happened, and now it suddenly seems as if time's moving at a faster pace. as if it were only yesterday i started schooling there. although, i have to admit, i loved times at my previous schools better with my old friends and shit. but i have to move on at some point. been making a lot of new friends though, so it's great. it mends my heart from missing my old friends too much. oh how i love them dearly. especially Michelle, my best friend. if only i could meet up with her this break. she's in KL now, so fat chance. :'( i do hope we don't grow apart too much. it's been MONTHS! for shit sake i miss her terribly.

updated my links. a lot of people either privatized their blogs or changed their links, so i deleted their links coz im too lazy to update. AND i am now part of The Kidney Farm hahah that just doesn't sound right, does it? anyway, i haven't been contributing much. *sigh. Yazin always keeps me feeling guilty. *grrr. hahahah. but he was nice enough to come up with a song called It's Not Easy which focuses mostly on keyboards, played by moi. although... Yazin said this tadi pagi,

(11:09 AM) Yazin of Kidney:and.. if anyone asks.. you came up with "its not easy" XDDD

so yeah, guess I'm the one who came up with It's Not Easy then. :P we have another jam session this Friday. cant wait! i've missed a lot already. been mia! with.. well, school. what with living at the boarding house and all. i hope It's Not Easy would have lyrics asap! can't wait!! :D HEHEHE.

"I smile because I have no idea what's going on,"

2009-06-27T14:38:00.002+08:00

i don't know what that whole thing is about. it was on some of my msn contacts punya pms. so, being the jobless person that i am, i googled it. banyak tees having that phrase on them and also titles to some peoples' posts or whatevs.

anyway, i've been having like ridiculous issues lately. i feel so lost. banar tah. inda ku paham! LOL. i seriously don't understand why these things are happening. i've been feeling so paranoid. i can just hope that things will unravel soon. at the mo, i can't really think straight. as my boss said, going through mental block right now. same here, boss. didn't tell anyone about this pasal i seriously don't know how to express my feelings into words. i did tell ken and mich though that lately aku scared and paranoid but yeah, i only told them part of the reason. entah eh. it's sooo hard. i don't understand. but whatever it is, i can just rely on Allah and smile throughout my days. as quoted in the title.

I Smile Because I Have No Idea What's Going On. :]

with you, it's a roller coaster ride. :]

2009-06-15T00:57:00.005+08:00

as painful as it is, i think i have been trying to make a huge step in my life. a step that i ~~thought~~ still think is hard to go through but i want to try because i don't think i want to simply run away again. i have to deal with it in order to keep someone who has made a huge impact on my life. it's been a long run, and i think i am ready to let it go. i don't want to be that way anymore. i have to move on, i just have to. i still want to keep you. i still love you, but i want to love you only as your friend and your sister. i want to take care of you for as long as i know you. i'll be there. whenever, where ever, whatever it is, just say the word and i'm all ears.

all my heart,

your friend. :]

putra came in third!

2009-06-13T13:29:00.003+08:00

stress jua ku tu. hahah! but it doesn't matter. the point is, we had fun today. didn't we fellas? especially during the warm up infront of the grand stand. I was so hyper! hahah. macam dance off wah tadi ah. but it kinda sucked the energy out of me. oh what the heck, I had fun! and afterwards during the announcement of the winners apa atu, Sai, Khadee, a PRS senior (i still don't know his name) and I were screaming macam orang gila cheering for our team mates and teachers. hahah! I never get tired of that. :D one more year, then it's off to uni and no more events like this lagi. SIGH. so yeah, I'm trynna make the best of what's left and live my life to the fullest everyday. sure, I shall try not to have too much fun as I have other responsibilities. but I want to go through everyday without having regrets or doubts as much as possible and not have to look back afterwards. ;]

I met soooooo many new friends at school. especially those di lobby pagi pagi, hahah. syiuk wah dorang atuu. i love them! oh yeah, tadi Hadi talur wah sama si Bob. dorang teriak teriak nyanyi lagu I Believe I Can Fly by Micheal Jackson. yetah Nad and I were like singing along dari jauh. hahahahah! I HAD FUUUUNNN! I am tired though. oh and and, I noticed the ex-SMSSAs are so handal. banyak top 20 tadi ah. I envy you guys! hahah. I think I am still so hyper. lepas ani kong tah ku ni. :P

I have things to do this holiday, Michelle belayar. huhu. dengan dorang si Nad tah hamba ni. I plan to sleepover at Keng's house pulang ni with Nad. heheh. and we have activities during the holidays. Environment club, Charity club and the Bridging Minds. yayers. i want to be active bah. and I need to do some running lagi with Nad and whoever wants to tag along. this was Nad's idea though. we are not fit bah. -___- I think I may be getting heavier compared to recent years. GAAAHH. lol. bah i have to go mandi now. I feel so BANGAS. hahah. euuw.

one event, four teams.

2009-06-12T21:26:00.003+08:00

cross country tomorrow.

GOOD LUCK TO ALL TEAMS, especially INDERA PUTRA!

hahah! aku semangat. YAAAAAHH! :D

see you all on the road tomorrow! ;D

Nurdamia Batrisyia

2009-01-01T22:06:00.001+08:00

i miss you, shasha. <3

NARUTO!

2009-01-01T21:58:00.001+08:00

YEAH! BELIEVE IT! HAHAHA!

jobless.

2008-12-30T20:10:00.001+08:00

bored. and this is all i have been doing this couple of days.

BBQ at ab's a couple of nights ago.

2008-12-22T12:13:00.002+08:00

cinta ku tulul dua ekong ah. ;P

webcam with hakki S2

2008-12-19T00:47:00.010+08:00

aww he's so adorable! (:

look at that heart-winning smile. ;)

love, manis muka you ah haha. ;p

this was masa he went offline, dpnya cute ah. haha!

aww hakki, i miss you. (:

back then

2008-12-18T14:42:00.000+08:00

well, we're all grown up now. aren't we, bro? (:

what a charmer!

2008-12-17T14:18:00.001+08:00

*sighs dreamily* if only... ;)

BHANA

2008-12-17T12:37:00.003+08:00

i went jalan with michelle, ken, nadhirah and "kuncu-kuncu" mereka yesterday. i picked up michelle and rebecca from home because my mom offered then we went to gadong to meet nadhirah and kenken. as soon as we got there, we bought tickets then the others makan arah foodcourt. sekali nad brought me down to meet zimah.

see, years ago nad and zim were my bestfriends. i guess we're not that close anymore but we still hit it off everytime we see each other. sigh, i miss zimah. nad and i went to the same secondary school even after the break of "bhana" *long story* so we're still close, i guess. zimah got taller! like taller than nad and catching on to me! she used to be the second shortest amongst the five of us bhana HAHA. God, i wonder how the other two are doing. haven't been in touch with them for a while. ah well, was good seeing you, zim. we need to talk nanti, catch up hehe. (:

Barizah.Hazimah.Amal.Nadhirah.Asmaa.

lame pulang, but yeah. we were kids! HAHA. ;p

anyway! haha we watched twilight bah yesterday. the movie dalam my head masa i read the book better pulang but still, it was awesome. haha. i think i was just so mesmerised by the cast of Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan, especially Edward lah. ada my junior kata he's not hot, but i say otherwise. haha! sorry, nabs. HOT wah ia! ;p and it was sweet. (: was better than when i read PS, I Love You and the movie turned out to be crappy. well not crappy, but it was.. ehh.. so-so? haha.

webcam with ken.

2008-12-17T11:50:00.001+08:00

this was a couple of nights ago. haha si kenken menalur ganya bah. but lagging banar lah that night. right, ken?

ps, I'm BORED.

webcam with nunu, ken and nyra.

2008-12-15T13:34:00.000+08:00

si nurul with hadiboy. HAHA. gay usul ku, nu! ;P

haha saya berjiwang with nyra. ;D

HAHA. thanks, mun. ykily. S2

i didn't get to save webcam ku sama si ken pasal laptop lagging haha sorry ken! nanti saja. ;p

punched out around 5.30am.

my colouring book and i

2008-12-14T21:54:00.001+08:00

aku lame? biaaarr. (:

Congratulatory.

2008-12-14T20:23:00.000+08:00

congratulations to all my cousins and juniors who passed their PMB exams. i'm overwhelmingly proud and happy for you guys! ;D work hard and good luck next year, ~~laiis~~ kiddos! haha. and a tip? masuk the classes that you guys want, not the classes that you guys are forced to enter or that your friends are in. this is your future we're talking about. so choose your decisions wisely, okay? i wish you guys all the best and juniors, i hope i see you around. (:

congrats, once again to;

Izah
Chawa
Alif
Syaza
War
Wani
Jir
Nabilah
Nain
other juniors who I happen to know. ;P

art!

2008-12-13T00:14:00.000+08:00

bida the picture. but i like the jacket. (:

feeqs made this. lawa ah? ;D

guess what that is?

a bird and a fox. ;)

at first i thought this was joker bah.

rupanya elf tah sudah tu. haha!

yingyang/note? haha i think.

but cool ay? (:

pictures stolen from feeqs! ;P

Happy 60th Birthday, ATOK. (:

2008-12-13T00:01:00.000+08:00

ashtatatata..~ haha!

Airto; Chasing Pavements.

2008-12-12T21:27:00.000+08:00

Seven Nation Army

2008-12-12T19:45:00.000+08:00

The White Stripes!

to Uncle B;

saya pandai sudah the drumming sikit-sikit.

HAHAHA. ketinggalan zaman. ;D

Showstopper (If I Had You) by AJ Rafael (:

2008-12-12T19:39:00.000+08:00

he's REALLY GOOD. I LOVE THIS SONG! ;D

Dear Maria (acoustic)

2008-12-12T14:11:00.000+08:00

ALEX! he's hot. ;D aku mau cool macam ia. HAHA.

Hari Raya Haji at Tok Uncu's. (:

2008-12-11T21:29:00.000+08:00

orang bertakbir, kami jamming.

HAHAHA! ;P

ESSEH mateen ah! berusaha ia kan belajar lagu A Lonely September ah. hahaha!

Uncle Bino; my guitar teacher, the COOLEST uncle! HAHA. kiss ass aku ah. haha nadawah! ;D

talur usulnya pakai those Mickey Mouse gloves ah! XP

Abang Ajees! one of my best supportive cousins! and a great listener too. (:

*nah kan abang aj, aku pandai pandai jua puji kau. haha!*

cehh! ;p

baiee hahaha!

berusaha kaliah ia at first! haha! XD

Tagged by kenken.

2008-12-05T14:59:00.000+08:00

the rules are simple. use Google Image to search the answers to the questions below. then you must choose a picture in the first page of results, and post it as your answer. after that, tag 7 people.

*i didn't exactly follow the rules for SOME of them* ;p

1. The age of my next birthday.

2. The place i'd like to travel to.

3. A favourite place.

*home*

4. A favourite thing.

*music*

5. A favourite food.

6. A favourite colour.

7. The city i live in.
8. The city i was born in.

9. A nickname i had.

amal saja. ;p

10. College major.

*mathematics*

11. Name of my love.

GUESS WHO! (:

12. A bad habit.

13. A hobby.

*day dreamin*

14. Wishlist.

*successful*

15. I tag;

Nunu.
Feeqs.
Nyra.
Chawa.
War.
Nurnik.
Zureen.

Tagged by kenken and feeqs.

2008-12-03T20:30:00.000+08:00

1.What is the most important thing in your life?
- family and friends.

2.What is the last thing you bought with your own money?
- nasi bungkus hahaha.

3.Where do you wish to get married?
- i'm still too young to be thinking of that. ;p

4.How old do you think you will be permanently owned by your lover?
- err 25?

5.Are you in love?
- no.

6.Where was the last restaurant you had dinner?
- Emperor's Court with uncu and ab. good times. (:

7.Name the latest book you've bought.
- yaahh. i forgot. masatu beli buku banyak-banyak one go. and now it needs reading saja lagi. haha.

8.What is your full name?
- amal zayyanah binti mohammad shamsul bahrein. ;D

9.Name the person you wish to meet in real life or the first time.
- err. i'll get back to you. haha.

10.Christina Aguilera or Britney Spears?
- neither? haha. entah ah. i liked both when i was a kid, now i don't. at all.

11.Do you do your own laundry?
- if arah babah saja.

12.Where is the most exciting place you wana go to?
- banyak. all over the world.

13.Hugs or kisses?
- hugs. (:

14. 8 things i'm passionate about:

food. ;p
family.
friends.
music.
math? HAHA whaaaat.
books.
baking.
hantah. i'll get back to ye!

15.8 things i say too often:

*oh that's easyy!*

palui.
panat.
baie.
gila.
shit.
setan.
babi.
fuch.

16.8 books i've read recently:
*since I've recently just finished my exams... and since i haven't been reading my story books this year, i'll include what i read last year haha.*

Biology.
Chemistry.
Geography.
Physics.
If You Could See Me Now.
Where Rainbows End.
PS, I Love You. *last year*
To Have And To Hold.

17.8 songs i could listen to over and over again:

Remembering Sunday.
Six Feet Under The Stars.
You Are My Everything.
Chasing Pavements.
Malam.
Istimewa.
Lesson Learned.
Three Cheers For Five Years.

*and the list goes on...*

18.8 things i've learned last year:

phys.
chem.
bio.
add math.
math d.
eng.
malay.
geo.

haha. mana lah ku ingat what i learnt last year!

I Miss You.

2008-12-03T15:03:00.000+08:00

uncuuuuu. amal rindu uncuuu. ijah puuun. emma puunn. erah puuun. roy puuun. pai okay2 lah. haha. uncuu seriously, i miss you. come home soon. ):

Tagged by feeqs and kenken.

2008-12-03T13:42:00.000+08:00

1. Where were you 3 hours ago?
- my bed, sleeping. yes, i woke up late.

2. Who are you in love with?
- nada. (:

3. Have you ever eaten a crayon?
- no.

4. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
- huh? uhh. i don't think so.

5. When is the last time you went to the mall?
- err. with feeqs and kenken bah masatu. bila tu you guys? last wednesday kali.

6. Are you wearing socks right now?
- no.

7. Do you have a car worth over $2,000?
- uhh yes. well, not mine tho. mom's car. :p

8. When was the last time you drove out of town?
- tssss yeah right! hantah. haha.

9. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days?
- nope.

10. Are you hot?
- no, i'm freezing right now. haha. apakan.

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
- err, water?

12. What are you wearing right now?
- still in my pjs!

13. Do you wash your car or let the car wash do it?
- kadang-kadang uda lets me wash his car for $5 haha.

14. Last food that you ate?
- nasi bungkus! HAHA.

15. Where were you last week at this time?
- gadong with feeqs and kenken.

16. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
- inda. ):

17. When is the last time you ran?
- yesterday.

18. What's the last sporting event you watched?
- uhh. football?

19. What is your favorite animal?
- cats! no doubt. (:

20. Your dream vacation?
- paris. who wouldn't dream of going there for a vacation?

21. Last person's house you were in?
- nana and atok's.

22. Worst injury you've ever had?
- hahaha. half of my body was bleeding when i had that bike accident when i was eight. i think that was the worst.

23. Have you been in love?
- yes.

24. Do you miss anyone right now?
- yes. (:

25. Last play you saw?
- uhh.. nada.

26. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
- hahaha. i have NO secret weapon.

27. What are your plans for tonight?
- erm. update cyber life? or minta bawa jalan arah mom sekejap.

28. Who is the last person you sent a MySpace message or comment?
- uhh. mun? arah cboxnya.

29. Next trip you are going to take?
- fuhh. i don't know yet. miri kali dengan babah and eb. haha.

30. Ever go to camp?
- nope.

31. Were you an honor roll student in school?
- HAHAHA! trynna be funny ay? the highest i've ever achieved pun second honor's award. certainly not an honor student, maan.

32. What do you want to know about the future?
- will I make my parents proud? (:

33. Are you wearing any perfume or cologne?
- no. aku balum mandi waheh! HAHA.

34. Are you due sometime this year for a doctor's visit?
- uh. inda.

35. Where is your best friend?
- di rumahnya?

36. How is your best friend?
- masatu ya kata ya kan demam. hang in there, mich. (:

37. Do you have a tan?
- inda. aku andang tanned! hahaha. BRUNEI bah ni!

38. What are you listening to right now?
- 98 degrees - you are my everything. (':

39. Do you collect anything?
- music.

40. Who is the biggest gossiper you know?
- hahaha. my dudes and dudettes semua gossipers! ain't that right? ;p

41. Last time you got stopped by a cop or pulled over?
- my dad. dulu. long story. haha.

42. Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?
- uhh yeah?

43. What does your last text message say?
- the one i sent or the one sent to me?
well, TO me - "Nda mami ingat syg." Mom. HAHA.
FROM me - "Okay nvm."

44. Do you like hot sauce?
- YES!

45. Last time you took a shower?
- yesterday. HAHAHA. meher. au wah. lapas ani aku mandi.

46. Do you need to do laundry?
- yeah.

47. What is your heritage?
- inheritanceku? err. hantah.

48. Are you someone's best friend?
- yeah. (:

49. Are you rich?
- i wouldn't read too much into that.

50. What were you doing at 12 a.m. last night?
- menalur dengan dorang ja-mah, fa-dah and fakh-qaf! HAHA. terbalik. (:

pictures at multiply!

2008-12-02T16:35:00.000+08:00

for more, go HERE.

Remembering Sunday (edited)

2008-11-24T16:27:00.000+08:00

He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes

Started making his way past two in the morning

He hasn't been sober for days

Leaning now into the breeze

Remembering Sunday, he falls to his knees

They had breakfast together

But two eggs don't last like the feeling of what he needs

Now this place seems familiar to him

She pulled on his hand with a devilish grin

She led him upstairs, she led him upstairs

Left him dying to get in

Forgive me, I'm trying to find

My calling, I'm calling at night

I don't mean to be a bother

But have you seen this girl?

She's been running through my dreams

And it's driving me crazy it seems

I'm gonna ask her to marry me

And even though she doesn't believe in love

He's determined to call her bluff

Who could deny these butterflies?

They're filling his gut

Waking the neighbors

Unfamiliar faces

He pleads, oh he tries

But he's only denied

Now he's dying to get inside

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy it seems
I'm gonna ask her to marry me

The neighbors said she moved away

Funny how it rained all day

I didn't think much of it then

But it's starting to all make sense

Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds

Are following me in my desperate endeavor

To find my whoever, wherever she may be

I'm not coming back (forgive me)

I've done something so terrible

I'm terrified to speak (I'm not coming, I'm not coming)

But you'd expect that from me

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt

Now the rain is just (You're driving me crazy, I'm)

Washing you out of my hair

And out of my mind

Keeping an eye on the world

From so many thousands of feet off the ground

I'm over you now

I'm at home in the clouds

And towering over your head

Well I guess I'll go home now (I guess I'll go home now)

I guess I'll go home now (I guess I'll go home now)

I guess I'll go home

Thursday, 20th November 2008

2008-11-21T12:21:00.000+08:00

we made COOKIES yesterday. :D

kenken, kim, feeqs and I.

Mun played RESIDENT EVIL with me yesterday pakai Wii.

*si Mun otw kan naikkan kakinya. HAHAHA. :P*

them chicks! oh how I love you guys S2.

it was really TOO BAD that Faww couldn't make it yesterday. ): kesian wah her. at first pasal the 17th outing. she was the one who planned everything yet she couldn't come because... well, something came up. SIGH. yesterday ada jua halangan that made Faww obligated not to come. hais. macam-macam banar eh. ani Faww is going to Japan soon. I really miss you, doll. you, and the rest, have really made a big impact on my life. if I could, I'll never forget you guys. and after next year, I sure hope our paths will cross again. (:

photos grabbed from Kenken's multiply!

HEHE. thanks, dude! ;D

Twilight

2008-11-21T12:11:00.000+08:00

whoaa. Edward is so cute! *kiaps kiaps* LOL. :P unfortunately the movie won't be premiering until December. SIGH. but uncu said she's going to bring me watch Twilight, kan cuu? HEHE. :D

Monsters VS Aliens

2008-11-21T11:55:00.000+08:00

LOL. I'm SOO gonna watch this movie! if I'm not mistaken, the blue brainless gooey dude is Seth Rogan. he's getting hotter kaliah. HAHA. ;P

Madagascar; Escape Africa

2008-11-21T11:53:00.000+08:00

it was really really FUNNY! no, I mean it was CRACK'A LACKIN'LY FUNNY! LOL. seriously, watch it. ;D

The Days We Had

2008-11-21T10:24:00.000+08:00

I found this picture arah chawa's blog. (:

Wednesday, 19th November 2008

2008-11-20T21:57:00.000+08:00

*aijers makan*

*ab*

*ab, aijers and i*

*HAHAHA nice shot, ncu!*

*ab, pai and uncu*

*aijers and uncu*

*aish menyampuk tah ku tu. ;p*

*what the fish?! jiwang lah? HAHAHA. drop my waterface cemani ani. :P*

*hais. perasan cute. :P*

*photo shoot lah? berangin-anginan. :P*

*cam-whoring; as vans said. LOL*

*ummmph! sehingga menjilat jari jemari, ay pai? :P

*one heck of a memory. :)*

Photos STOLEN from Vans S2. (:

Tuesday, 18th November 2008

2008-11-20T20:59:00.000+08:00

(perasan RED carpet lah? HAHA)

(kenken and amni)

(feeqs and i)

i'm blue en-ba-da-dee-dop be-die-ya-ba-da-dee-dop *dances around* HAHA

ps. thank you my saviours,

~~my knights in shining armors~~

my princesses in sublime gowns (wth?) HAHA.

you know i love you. (:

The Night of November 17th

2008-11-17T23:15:00.000+08:00

(nadiee and amit)

(nadiee, amit and i)

(seri and i)

(diel, mich and i)

(what tha heck?! HAHA. amit and i menalur)

TAG; by vans and kenniferrr!

2008-11-15T11:08:00.001+08:00

1. take a recent picture of yourself, or take a picture of yourself right now.
2. don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair. just take a picture.
3. post that picture without editing.
4. post these instructions with your photo.
5. tag 5 people to do this.

well, here goes...

(okay. I seriously look like crap. HAHA.)

and now tagging...

nyra
abang ariff
zureen
chawa
nunu

haha i don't know siapa lagi baaah.

Poetically Pathetic

2008-11-13T15:43:00.000+08:00

I'm thinking of the words to say,

I'd like to think that this was fate.

Reference to a song you love,

spell confusion with a 'k'.

Like a star without its strings,

I'm hanging here on these two wings.

For that smile and those eyes,

I'm falling.

If time could stop, how could I make this more poetic?

When there's nothing more pathetic to be said.

(Here goes...)

You bring me out, show me light,

I'm sorry if I hide, I'm too afraid to look inside.

You carry truth, and make me smile.

If it were you and me tonight,

I would tame the stars and save the brightest one for you.

Naruto

2008-11-08T19:43:00.000+08:00

okay, so I've got to admit that lately I've been going through what I hope is a phase *chuckles* where I became a major Naruto aficionado (LOL!) and it's ALL MY BROTHER'S FAULT! ;P pasal kan pasal kaann..~ umm arah Cartoon Network every weeknights at 10.00 p.m. ada Naruto for about 20 minutes and it's been translated into English. yetah my adek masatu watched the first few episodes and I happened to join him.

at first I was all, "eh kacau my programme eh anak ani." sekali masa the second time I sat and watched it, the main character, Naruto, was saying how he wants to be the village Hokage because he wants to gain some respect from his peers and all, it was a bit inspiring lah. hahaha lame pulang, I know but whatev. ;p and I felt pitiful pasal Naruto being without his parents apa, macam kesian lah hehe. what made me more attached to the show was the appearance of Hatake Kakashi! oh. my. God. the hottie of the show haha!

I know I'm, how you say, so ketinggalan zaman, but all these while I've just been so lazy to watch anime. in addition, macam a bit menyusahkan bah reading subtitles just because you HAVE TO in order to understand the cerita. otherwise, you'll just be watching some action and listening to gibberish the whole cerita, kan? haha I like animes pulang. i think the first anime I've really ever been into was Aishiteru Ze Baby pasal it was soo cute HEE. oh which reminds me. thanks too my droopy uncle Bino for downloading me the whole thing. I mean every series bah hehe thanks uncle Bin! ;D bah, guess that's it. =)

Characters I've Come To Known

(Kakashi Hatake, Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno and Naruto Uzumaki)

(Hiruzen Sarutobi)

(Iruka Umino)

(Tazuna)

(Inari)

(Zabuza and Haku)

(Neji Hyuga)

(Tenten)

(Temari)

(Kankuro)

(Gaara)

(Maito Gai)

(Rock lee)

(Konohamaru)

(Kurenai Yuhi)

(Hinata Hyuga)

(Choji Akimichi)

(Ino Yamanaka)

Chibis!

Note

2008-11-08T18:01:00.000+08:00

Sunday, 9th November

Hazimah - 16th birthday!
Maths 'D' tuition class at Mr Jeya's; 8.00 - 10.00 a.m.

Monday, 10th November

Mohammad Shu'aib (lil' brotha) - 11th birthday!
Maths 'D' Paper 2; 8.00 - 10.30 a.m.
Add.Maths tuition class at Mr Jeya's; 2.30 - 4.30 p.m.

Tuesday, 11th November

Asmaa Hani - 16th birthday!
Add.Maths tuition class at Mr Jeya's; 8.30 - 10.30 a.m.
Add.Maths Paper 1; 2.00 - 4.00 p.m.

Wednesday, 12th November

Physics Paper 1; 8.00 - 9.00 a.m.
Physics Paper 2; 9.30 - 11.15 a.m.
Geography Paper 1; 2.00 - 3.15 p.m.
Add.Maths tuition class at Mr Jeya's; 3.30 - 5.00 p.m.

Thursday, 13th November

Add.Maths Paper 2; 8.00 - 10.00 a.m.

Monday, 17th November

Ash - 20th birthday!
Chemistry Paper 1; 8.00 - 9.00 a.m.
Chemistry Paper 2; 9.30 - 11.00 a.m.

OH GOD! I FEEL RESTLESS ALREADY! =/

Birthday Greetings!

2008-11-05T16:57:00.000+08:00

(here's abang nazeef, abang yadee at the back with shakir, abang han and abang ariff)

happy belated 23rd birthday, abang han! ;D haha sorry i forgot to greet you earlier. i just remembered today hehe.

(here's abang ajeem and abang yadee)

happy 20th birthday, abang ajeeeem! HAHA. the big TWO-OH! ;P

(abang ajeem, abang nazeef, abang han, adek hisham, abang ariff and abang yadee)

them boys! HAHA. these pictures saja i have of you guys, masa nini girl punya birthday ah. =)

(kaka mally =])

and lastly, happy 20th birthday, kaka mally! HEHE.

you know i love you guys,
amal zayyanah. S2

Mayday Parade

2008-11-04T09:00:00.000+08:00

When I Get Home You're So Dead

i don't know why, but i just LOVE posting videos! HEHE. ;D
this song's great, i love it. lama pulang sudah, but still it's nice hehe. enjoy! ;)

Boyce Avenue (original)

2008-11-03T16:59:00.001+08:00

Change Your Mind

All The While

Hear Me Now

Find Me

Yesterday; second November

2008-11-03T12:04:00.000+08:00

Majlis Tahlil dan Doa Kesyukuran

(photos grabbed from vans's blog)

there's mimi, muiz and i. (:

maan, yesterday was crazy after the function. we were busy cleaning up like crap. but during the 'business', we had fun what with da mel, mimi, aijerr and mama si aijerr in the kitchen crackin up and all. haha was great.

earlier in the morning, went out with mims and aijerr (who btw membangas masa we went jalan) hahaha so she stayed in the car masa we bought food.

while mims and i were waiting for the food;

me, "apa abar si aijerr ah? kena rogol sudah kah belum?"

mims, "entah ah. tapi usulnya macam belum tedangar ya teriak-teriak minta tolong pulang tu. insya Allah, belum lah."

(or something like that ;p)

hahaha then when we got back to the car, us inda nampak aijerr punya kepala wah.

me, "buh ncu, kepala si jah ilang. kena rogol tia sudah kali, inda?"

mims, "au ahh. shit, mal. cana gitau pakngah (daddy si aijerr) ni?"

me, *laughs* "au ahh. palui eh."

haha silly. lastu ada tia ijah punya kepala menonjol when we got to the car. rupanya ya limpang-limpang. dikuncinya lagi kereta tu. takut ya kali kena rogol haha. and i remember before we got out of the car ya ada pesan, "kunci kereta sebelum kamu keluar ah?" haha lawak wah anak atu.

moving on. the function. grrhh. i taked to aijerr and chawa most of the time. i had some issues with some people. apparently i feel that someone is trying to take my spot from a certain other someone. hantaheh, maybe i'm just paranoid that i'm not as close as i was to that other someone like before. i also ended up talkin to pai saja. that's a good thing though. pai and i were really close when we were kids. then early teen began, had some issues of our own and grew apart. even when we were around each other, we fought most of the time. fortunately, we set our differences apart and got closer again. yay pai! :D

alright, that's it. wouldn't wanna bore people to death. HEE. ;)

Boyce Avenue (covers) S2

2008-11-01T23:00:00.000+08:00

Bleeding Love

Better In Time

Home

Realize

Apologize

No Air

Because Of You

Sweetest Girl

and lots more. =)

Jamie All Over

2008-10-30T23:53:00.000+08:00

I had a dream last night we

Drove out to see Las Vegas

We lost ourselves in the bright lights
I wish you could have seen us

Begging for change to get home
Or at least San Francisco

Let's put a ten on the high card
And spend the summer on the West Coast

Down and to the left
(Here's a map and a pen, this place, let's point it out)

Be California's best
(All I ask, all I ask)

And please don't tell me that I'm dreamin'
When all I ever wanted was to dream another sunset with you

If I roll over
When it's over
I'll take this Cali sunrise with me
And wake up with the fondest memories

We made love by the ocean
As the waves crashed around you
The sunset's never were so bright
And the skies never so blue

You opened up into my arms
And we laughed as I held you
I'll never go back to Georgia
Not at least 'till I have to

Mimi Hartini. if not for you, i'm not the person i am today.

2008-10-30T20:04:00.000+08:00

all my life i've faced nothing but misery. i was a weak pathetic loser. nothing but a hopeless push-over. i couldn't stand up for myself when people push me around and talk shit about me. i always let people win. i cared too much of what people had to say about me. it's like i didn't have a life, at all.

but then a few years ago, i lived under the same roof with you. honestly, you were tough to deal with. you were manipulative and harsh at times. you scolded me, faught with me and all shits. but by the end of the day we always managed to work things out. we coped with it each other, and we learnt a lot about one another. looking back now, i don't regret all those things that happened because all in all, you were one of those people who stood by me when i had issues. you gave me strength, confidence and hope when i started my teen years. i have you to thank for. i admire you because all these years, no matter what happened, you've always been the strongest person that i've met, even when you're in deep shiitt. you managed to fight your weakness and instantly get back up on your feet. i look up to you. you inspired me to be a better person, to get a life and don't give a fish about what people have to say about me. you had me believing that i have my own qualities and that i'm unique in my own way. well, you know what? i feel the same way about you. and i know that whatever you're going through right now, you'll get over it soon. if you need time anyway, know that i'll always be there for you. izah and i, both of us will. i give you my word.

i love you, sweetie. a lot S2.
from the very bottom of my heart,
amal zayyanah.

Hump de Bump!

2008-10-30T13:59:00.000+08:00

yeah! shake it, bro! HAHAHA!
at first when my brother started dancing to the song, i recorded him without him realising it. but then i couldn't stand it, he looked so ridiculous that i let out a chuckle. finally he found out that i was recording a video of him using mom's laptop, but he continued to boogie anyway HAHA. talur usulnya! hahahaha! however, towards the end the video got kind of boring. ;p

OHH. I WANT YOU.

2008-10-29T21:53:00.001+08:00

I WANT IT SO BAD!

Connected Jukebox

Stream MP3s & videos. Widescreen display with high quality stereo sound.

Web
Create, update and explore on the move,with an integrated QWERTY keyboard and high resolution 4.13" widescreen display. Web 2.0 compatible Mozilla based browser and Adobe Flash 9 Plug-in.

Communications
Chat, internet and stay in touch via Skype, Google Talk or Gizmo with integrated VGA web camera and Bluetooth headset support.Email applications and web-based email support.

Entertainment
Stream and store MP3s and videos with 2GB of internal storage and memory expansion slot compatible with cards up to 8GB.

Navigation
Know your locations and see what's around with the map applications. Upgrade to voice guided navigation.

Features:

Sliding, backlit keyboard

Front-facing webcam

Ambient Light Sensor

Integrated GPS

2GB integrated internal storage and one MiniSDHC card slot

Sunlight readable transflective display

Two full-sized SDHC card slots

Pop-out, rotating webcam

FM radio tuner

Biology GCE O'Level Exam

2008-10-29T12:50:00.000+08:00

yeap, had the Biology papers today. paper one was... ehh, so-so. paper two? oh God, i don't even want to get started on that. HEHE. ;D

GCE O'LEVEL
man, i hope i get through this. if i don't, who knows what else i can't do. and this is just the "Ordinary Level" exam.

My aim: at least five A's, a couple of B's and a C. huhh, i'm thinking the C's for my Bio but heck i sure hope not. i'm just so not confident with Bio. if it's not Bio then it's Phys. SIGH. the ONLY subs i can count on are my Add Maths, Maths D and English for SpongeBob's sake! and that's because those subs don't need memorising a lot of stuff. I really don't like memorising a lot. unless it's something important to me. HEHE. ;D

hehh. anyway one down, two to go. Chem and Phys that is. more memorising, yayy JOY. *puke puke gag gag vomit vomit* ;p

well, ye do what ye gotta do. right? later! :D

Confessions of A Passive Smoker

2008-10-28T10:54:00.000+08:00

Six Feet Under The Stars

2008-10-28T10:25:00.000+08:00

Meet me on Thames Street

I'll take you out, though I'm hardly worth your time

In the cold you look so fierce, but I'm warm enough

Because the tension's like a fire

We'll hit South Broadway in a matter of minutes

And like a bad movie, I'll drop a line

Fall in the grave I've been digging myself

But there's room for two

Six feet under the stars